An epic report!

It's a cruel world and none crueller than that of a child learning the ropes of Rugby. The first two years from under seven's are all nice and lovely. Little Jonny isn't going to get too hurt and besides, Tag rugby is a little bit like Pokemon - you've got to get em' all.

After two years of nothing more than a mild bout of bundle they are then thrown into the big time. Rucks, mauls, line outs, and the tackle but this year was a year that the under 9's were also thrown a lifeline. A lifeline to encourage children to continue to keep within the code and not end up going the way of the round ball. A concern that has more too do with our love (as parents) of the social side of Rugby than the fitness of our kids!

But I digress. Little Johnny was just about to have to learn a dozen new tricks of the trade within a short space of time and then some smart fellow at RFU thought for a moment and wondered how it was ever going to work, that a child would have to learn so fast. One coach, a marvel of brilliance but whose name escapes me, explained it thus, "it's the equivalent of a child having to learn French, German, Spanish, Chinese and Latin in one year. It's too much."

So we arrive on a sunny morning at Mackenders’ and ready to send our charges into battle with those merry (large) men of West Norfolk. And this time the code is different. All they need to do is take what they have learnt in Tag and add in the tackle. But if we are all honest it's more of a half tackle. Two hands on the shirt of another for three seconds to be precise.

But does this protect or does it mollie coddle? It's too soon to tell. One thing’s for sure both teams put up a great display of running rugby. West Norfolk started out better drilled, faster to the tackle, harder in the tackle and less concerned for those trampled under foot. Welcome to Rugby Boys and Girls.

But in the first game Diss learnt fast. Unlike Andy who starts the game feeling charitable allowing West Norfolk(WN) to blast through following a knock-on.

Like most teams you have the kids that fall into easily described categories. The fast one. The hard one. The fat one.

The slow one, the nippy one, the sly one and I could go on, but then no one would talk to me next week!

Fast for Diss is Owen Davies and he started out as he left the last season, legging it like a gazelle on the Masai Mara being chased by hungry cheetahs. And most of the time he escapes to score.

Diss new-boy, Ben Faulkner begins the game like his life depends upon it and is both gracefully in the run and ferocious in the tackle. Some are taught and some have skills that are god-given and Ben falls into the latter category. He was born to play Rugby and at any given moment manages to destroy the opposition with fleet of foot that spooks the West Norfolk side.

But it's not enough to stop West Norfolk scoring again. Joe decides to grab the game by the scruff of the neck, and starts to take the game to them. Ben has a friend. Henry joins them and before you know it Adam is powering through using his strength and laying off to Kieron. One down at half time and possibly should have been more but Andy's Army is gaining in strength. The boys look at each other knowing that this is a step up but relishing the challenge.

With so many players in the Diss under 9's they have to make way for team mates so it's three more on for the second half and three off. Arthur, a kid whose rugby brain defies his years, makes an immediate impact hustling and bustling the opposition to almost score in the corner. More is to come from young Arthur.
But WN are persistent, passing at the tackle and keeping movement at the top of the wish list. Diss hit hard and get in the seven tackles and from the break, that boy Owen picks up and runs fifty metres that leaves the opposition wondering what just happened.

Now Diss are up and running and after a quick breakdown Diss move fluidly through the opposition with Ben, Joe and Owen combining to get a great second try. It's two apiece and no time to have a kip. But Diss are tired. Sleep-overs are not conducive to fast rugby and they are a team of party doyens. They are almost horizontal as WN get another break away try. Lesson was not learnt and from the restart they allow possession to go back to WN who again break through far too easily. And that's how they ended up. Losing 3-4 in the first game. Defeat snatched from the jaws of victory.

Time for a new team to have a go. Poor old WN don't have the strength in numbers but they make up for lack of team mates by starting the second game as they left the first with an attempted run to the try-line but this time Drew hits hard and it results in a knock on by WN. But Diss are plagued by in-decision. Who wants it? Who knows.
The good news is that Finn, Elliott, Drew, Stanley, Miles, Matthew and Harry are relishing the tackle.
WN strike first due to Diss just hanging back too much rather than running to the tackle. Paul's exhortations from the sideline muster courage and the boys fight back with a scrappy but well deserved try that Stanley puts just over the line.

WN don't give in easily and Diss seem to want to celebrate the last try a little too much. Duly punished and as if sore from the crime of absenteeism Diss get on a march with a display of passing between six players that the first team would have been powerless to stop. Miles grabs the glory from a truly great team try.
Half time team talk from Andy consists of telling Stanley to get his haircut. Fair point. Well made.

If Diss don't run to the tackle, this season will be painful. WN start and Diss watch as they run through a channel that is wide open. But again stirred by either embarrassment or anger, possibly a mixture, Diss led by Finn, Harry, Drew and the incredible Megan put a move together that flummoxes WN and results in Miles scoring another excellent try.

This Diss team have bite and none more so than when they know they have been caught napping. Finn is quick and firm to the tackle, his face grimacing with effort and he leads the defence forcing errors from WN. But they don't give up easily and they keep on pushing resulting in another excellent break away by WN.

A bit of tackling by use of the feet gives early turnover to Diss and again the wonder girl Megan pops up and takes the ball to the opposition only to lay off a the last second to a waiting Drew who ghosts through to score.

It ends up 4 try's each and MOM is Finley for his tackling and leading the charge.

The last game see's Diss get off to a fast start with Drew scoring from the off. A couple of hasty kicks by WN results in a turnover and Adam pushes on ten yards with most of the WN team hanging from his shirt sleeves. Was it a trip, was it a fumble? We will never know but the resulting knock on gives WN the opportunity to run for the line and Diss allow them a route through but awake just in time to force WN into touch.

This third game has real bite and WN rise to the challenge. Stan makes a artful dodgers run as if being chased by the store police but again WN make the tackle. From the restart Joe looks like a man possessed and forces WN into touch and possibly onto the moon. It's amazing how a hard hit can defy the laws of gravity.

But Diss will continue to wait for WN to run onto them with the ball and they are punished again and again. Eradicate this from there game and Diss will be a force this year.

And the reason they are contenders is because of what happened next. Drew is passed the ball and then hit with a thunderous tackle by a sizeable WN player and he just soaked it up. It was a real bone cruncher and still he had the presence of mind to lay off to his mate, Stan, who dutifully put it over the line.

After half time and with both teams looking forward to a hot dog, and fathers giving the knowing nods to each other, Diss, led by an Arthur charge, keep on tackling. Time and again WN are forced into touch by Arthur and eventually both teams are told to make the tackle and not too push but the effort is clear for all to see. Skills will come.

The warning has stung Diss and they resume half asleep allowing WN to own the next five minutes and they punish Diss hard. More try's than the parents care to mention but eventually, in the last two minutes, Diss are stirred into action. Seven tackles, each of them majestic, give turnover to Diss resulting in one last try and a glimmer of hope that burns bright among the boys and girl of the U9's

West Norfolk go home worthy winners over the three games scoring 2 wins to Diss's one.

Bar match report.
Led by Jim and James the parents put in some hard elbow work. Our usual front row (Paul) were on Shandy's so it was clear they weren't at the races. After a visit to the cash point I came back strongly and made headway into a sizeable amount of Adnams but the real hero has to be Jim for a quote that will live long in the memory. I cant repeat it which i know is annoying to the extreme, but at least i'll be trusted to hear others without fear of the deliverer having them plastered over the website! Great stories by Andy about a recent stag night and all were happy and ready for Sunday Lunch and the week ahead. Heaven forbid if the little ones ever wanted to stop playing Rugby!

Reporter: Sam Spurdens